I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
my tampon string is in my asshole... do you think i can get it out without anyone noticing?
i'd get off the bar first.
even my farts smell like vagina
Dibs on passing out in front of the toilet.
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
Well I just found the most comfortable way to pass out on my toilet if I ever have to.
Its a good thing to know for upcoming events.
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
All our friends are getting married, and I'm the dateless guy bringing molly to their weddings.
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
Randomize
