let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
Almost accidentally stole a baby... explain later
It was 5 a.m. and we found him making margaritas with nyquil...
Wore last nights jeans to Christmas Dinner with the fam, found a half gram of blow, while they're praying ill be railing.
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
Just saw pictures of a pregnant teen from my hometown with an American flag wrapped around her naked body posted on FB without irony. These are my roots.
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
Like he's moved to LinkedIn creeping on me since he's blocked everywhere else & I'm just so confused does he think I'm going to post daily updates of my life on FUCKING LINKEDIN
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
Randomize
