My right nipple has been called many things but never a ghost pig
Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
you turned on the Care Bears movie at 5am and kept screaming "I CARE"
I could hear his roommate in the background imitating my sex sounds...
At the wedding. Seated next to the bar. No way this ends well
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
I did not get laid last night bc my condoms were too small. I'm allowed to be dreary
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
I'm watching Russian dudes pole-dance. For research.
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize
