out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
I bought a goldfish, named it after my ex-girlfriend, and let it die. It's really the little things in life.
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
I found him crying and drunk, in my closet holding a picture of Tyler Perry. He managed to say"he's just so many people"
He dodged my hug and greeted me with a fist bump. I slept with him the night before. The only thing worse would have been a greeting by chest bump.
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
Dont even get me started. you fell asleep in my kitchen after being cockblocked when you tried to use my roommates bedroom.
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
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