i'm sending her a home depot gift card for the hole i put in her wall. call it good?
One of my friends found 6 bags of gummy bears on the roof. He lives a building over. Apparently even hammered you still have quite an arm
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
i refuse to hook up with a girl that looks like drew carey.
Dude he did say "let's go cougar hunting" and you KNEW your mom was going out last night...so it's kind of your own fault for not coming
Everywhere I look there's another kitten this is so ideal
Can I live on acid? Kittens man. Kittens.
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
I'm not gonna swipe right, he has better hair than me. Just no.
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
The night went downhill somewhere between the time I was triple fisting smirnoff and when I was throwing up in the yard in nothing but my bra while he talk to me about mashed potatoes
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
Randomize
