it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
Is it penis luge time yet?
SHE WON'T ROUND UP MY GRADE! I have a 79.8% I ONLY MISSED TWO CLASSES!!! ONE WHEN I GOT DRUGGED AND ONE WHEN MY CAR GOT BROKEN INTO!! I'm interculturally competent. I used to date a Italian/Cherokee Indian. I fucked a Palestinian. How much more pro-peace can you get?
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
This guy at the airport was telling me 3/4 dudes in his group got rufied at some strip club. One guy woke up in the hospital, another found himself in a random parking garage, the other got back to the room and they all shit their pants. Go Vegas.
I'm so lazy and tired i just want to cry and fall asleep in a bed of egg mcmuffins.
A check for $9 that I used to buy six boxes of Girl Scout cookies bounced. I think I've hit a new low.
Despite breaking my phone, thumb, and my dignity, last night was pretty good.
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
My autobiography will be 500 pages of the words "I probably should've thought this through" typed over and over.
This couple is walking their pig around campus
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
Randomize