just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
John tries to set me up, and she has 1 arm. I'm a nice guy, but 2 arms is kinda a requirement
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Maybe we should try and tone it down a notch. The neighbors changed the name of their wifi network to "i can hear you having sex".
I know this is weird, but can you ask your girlfriend if she has my mailbox?
Seriously?
100%
im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
Best thing law school has taught me: how to use logic to turn a girls "no I will not have sex with you" into "well I might as well get laid"
Apparently riding the dog like its a small horse is frowned upon in this establishment
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
Just got home. Taking a quick shower. I smell like sex and chorizo. Dont ask.
So I should just walk in, look him in the eye and say, "I just came to fuck your brother, nice to meet you" and just walk to your room.
I just sent a dick pic to a number on Craigslist, this may be my new low
No, I'm not a weirdo, I keep bondage straps under my matress like a normal person, not a diary.
Bad part of last night: I puked in my hair. Good part of last night: I assembled a posse.
You kept pulling me aside saying "look what I found"
Randomize