White coat. Heels.
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
I couldn't remember if it was hamsters or Iraq that you hated. I'm so sorry.
My mom asked what the mark on my neck was - I told her I burned it with a straightener.
She believed that the monsterous hickey on your neck was a burn?
well, not really. but then i reminded her that my sister has yet to take that pregnancy test and she conviniently forgot about my hickey
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
The polish Muslims are throwin paczkis into the crowd and I'm beer 6 before 11 am
You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.
Today my mom told me "that's what worries me about you getting blacked out drunk... You don't look pretty"
The cop let me finish my J before he cuffed me. Coolest arresting officer ever.
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
He came home at 2 AM on roller skates with his hair dyed pink while singing "Sweet Transvestite" and throwing glitter on all of us and everything we own. We had to call a cleaning guy.
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
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