Yeah. I woke up naked in his bed this morning and remember saying "Get a condom cuz I can't afford an abortion right now" last night. He didn't run. He's a keeper
alone in the kitchen at 4 am eating a hotdog.
you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
if I'm ever single again, I swear to god I'm going to have 87 venerial diseases
somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
I smell like Captain Morgan and tears
Jesus christ how hard is BRING SNACKS AND DRUGS to interpret? I trust your judgement on this one.
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
All I've done for this 11 hour car ride is kegel and listen to our sex playlist so your dick better be good and ready
Decided to make myself tequila gummy bears but got impatient and just drank the bowl of tequila.
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
So I decided to sleep with him for the first time in months so I can convince him it's his kid instead of the other guy
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
I love how we can bond over the fact that we're the only ones who think the guy I drunk hooked up with looks like Voldemort
Randomize
