yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies
why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
I don't think the car's salesman understands that I am about to vomit on him.
Who is this?
You offered to lift up your dress at the bar so I could see your lower back tattoo
Um, I think that was a general offer to everyone. So...who IS this?
When you sober up and come in here, I'm in your bed because you pissed on me in mine. So fuck. Off.
I literally was just rolling on the ground and said to her 'this is what dying looks like'
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
Did you know there is a guy on the porch, wrapped in your snuggie, singing no woman no cry and drinking wine coolers?
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
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