What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
We just took the batteries out of the fire alarm to play the breathalyzer game. I love college.
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
I've been at work 30 min broke a paper towel holder a chair set a box on fire and fell down twice. Hungover Brian just reached a new level
When you called me you were telling a hobo that you couldn't spare ten bucks bc that was your beer money. All your words were slurred.
Fuck him.
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
My office already closed tomorrow. I'm bout to get drunk and build a muh fuckin fort. I shall call it "Fort Fuck You, Sandy, You Fuckin Bitch"
Nothing says "First Single Holidays" quite like getting baked with the guy that took your virginity four years ago.
Waking up with cheese all over my clothes and my vibrator in my pants is a sign we drank way too much tequila last night
i need some fresh meat. meat that has a license and a job and isn’t a FULL-blown alcoholic. partial i could tolerate, bc, haha, let’s be honest, me likey my drinkies.
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
Randomize
