I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
I need to move out. I just walk of shamed my way into a family breakfast party. There's no response when grandma says "where you coming from in heels at 9AM?"
Woke up with pink eye in both my eyes. That's how the threesome went
You were doing karaoke. Then you screamed "SHOUTOUT TO ADAM LAMBERT" and started making out with the very surprised looking guy next to you.
i wasn't going to tell her about the threesome but i had to explain the tree and the green paint everywhere
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
You won't wear your Santa suit, I can't get trashed, and you won't use handcuffs! This is the worst Christmas EVER.
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
I don't need this shit right now. I just woke up covered in pistachios
You'll love it there. Trust me. Cheap tequila, pretentious beer, tall white guys who will treat you badly. Its got everything you like.
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
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