I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
SOME GIRL ON THE STAIRS IN FRONT OF ME JUST FARTED AND IT WENT STRAIGHT INTO MY MOUTH!
He left an unopened 12 pack of beer by my bed. I guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex..
Just got an Edible Arrangement my parents sent me for my birthday. Time to marinate some fruit in vodka.
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
Apparently Bin Ladens last act of terrorism is cock blocking me....
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
WHY DON'T YOU WANT TO BE MY ESKIMO BRO
I s2g I’m about to get ghosted by a 34 yr old and my Oedipus complex cannot take it
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
My New Year's resolution consists of less weekday hangovers, more sex, and more money.
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