I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
if i wake up one more time on my porch im gonna start considering myself homeless
Just made a photo collage of the girls I've hooked up with this summer. I'm patting myself on my back right now
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
Look I know it's late and I hope this doesn't wake you up but I feel like you should know that I'm sleeping on my couch in my own apartment so that my friend can get laid in my bed, and I would do the same for you.
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
I just washed out an empty chocolate milk bottle to take whiskey on my bike ride.
You are not an adult
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
The waitress at the airport bar just asked me if I wanted a "to go" beer, hahahahaha OF COURSE I WANT A TO GO BEER.
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
I asked you for a cigarette and you handed me your phone and told me to search for one
I just loudly threatened to kill a self checkout machine
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
Randomize