margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
I really think my ability to vom without making noise mmight be my most useful talent
Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
Probably should plan this out. Step one: grow stache. Two: get trenchcoat. Three: Kidnap Selena Gomez.
I had better be fucking involved with step four.
you assured me you'd make it home safe because your pizza rolls were waiting up for you.
You passed out in the bathroom with the door locked. Had to take a shit in your litter box. Don't worry, your cat buried it for me.
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
I think it says something about my life when I start picking up girls while im in rehab. And I don't think it's good.
My mom just made me promise her that i'll care about the next guy I sleep with
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
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