I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
why are there beer bottles in my dishwasher?
As im putting my laundry in the machine, i find a solo cup and a pong ball that i signed babe ruth
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
you know it takes a lot for me to use utensils conservatively
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
The guy who was interviewing me asked if I had coke on my pants. You win this time Las Vegas
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
What?? I could've slept with an ordained minister!
this bedazzled flask is my best investment yet
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