How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
I couldn't tell if those girls from the bar were lesbians or just awesome
Just because Aaron is a gender neutral name does not mean I am letting you name your baby after a drug dealer
My fingers feel amazing. Their going like 100 MPH!!
HOLY SHIT. SHIT THAT IS HOLY. HOLY OF THE SHIT.
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
My liver and I thought we knew what we signed up for. We were wrong.
Sometimes you just gotta fuck a has been local celebrity for your 15 minutes.
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
You HAVE to stop telling me about the shit you do drunk. I can't be both your brother AND your gay friend.
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
I got a discount on the lube for giving the cashier focaccia bread from work.
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
Randomize
