Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
Oww! U thought rug burn was bad! Fuckin carseat burn hurts like a mother!!!
Wtf?
Use the slutty part of ur brain.
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
Christmas on farmville was waaaaay better than my actual Christmas.
woke up in a garbage bag. literally. it was used as a sleeping bag.
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
Who is this?
You offered to lift up your dress at the bar so I could see your lower back tattoo
Um, I think that was a general offer to everyone. So...who IS this?
Just found my bra in a bag of chips on the kayak floating about the pond. Sure sign of a good night
And then you'll find yourself a hot chick and leave me behind with nothing but my back fat to keep me company.
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
I think I passed out drunk at my own jewelry party
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