Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
i cleaned the weed out of my bowl, pretended it was a spoon and ate oatmeal with it. my mom cried
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
This is the prime rib incident all over again
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
Nobody in the ambulance liked me...
Everytime I try to keep track of the amount of people I slept with I always forget about that guy I met on the dc metro, where I woke up to him organizing his Special K and Molly and I was covered in sleeping cats.
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
Yeeah, I think a threesome is one of those wedding presents you can't register for at Bed Bath And Beyond..
It's the never-ending clusterfuck that is my love life
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
Randomize
