But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
They should try giving mcdonalds to cancer patients because it just cured the worst hangover ive ever had
So i learned you can't hair-of-a-dog jaeger hangovers.
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
Not only did I get the promotion, but last night after sex he took me outside and let me hold it for him while he peed in the snow. I made a heart. This week is going amazing
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
The best thing about last night is when drunk Lauren asked cop if she could smoke a joint in front of him. And next thing I remember she’s smoking weed with a cop. How awesome is that.
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
I’m calling dibs!
You can’t call dibs on dick. That’s free range dick. May the best vagina win!
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