so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
She was lying in bed moaning while eating a Snickers and masturbating.
Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
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she wants me to meet her parents and she hasn't even met my penis yet.
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
You had me at "mimosas" several texts ago.
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
She was wearing my robin hood hat from Halloween shouting "steal from the rich and give to the poor, mothafuckaaaaas." We are taking her everywhere.
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OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
So besides your brother walking in on you shaving and singing "I'm gonna get asssss" how was your night
So we are in the middle of sex and his brother knocks on the door and says "dude I just wanted to know if you want to see the fish I got tonight"
You're having marijuana delivered to you. You're buying drugs and you aren't even leaving the house. I'm sure he'll be surprised if you're NOT wearing a bathrobe.
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
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