JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
Is it penis luge time yet?
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
Oh we're fine. I made her a "sorry I peed on you" omelet.
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
Im dating a 38 year old who's lap I can fit in. Tell me I don't have daddy issues.
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
Using the balance in my bank account I just calculated how many fifths of vodka I can buy this year. Don't let me buy food, all my money is reserved for alcohol
If you've ever wanted to get filthy in a Catholic church before 2 on a Wednesday, I might be your guy.
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
Great. I will show up in your office wearing only oven mitts later today.
His baby mama found the pictures of us, she couldn't see my face but she could see my asshole. So I'm safe.
Randomize
