I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
I just snorted a line of adderall through a rolled up business card for the Michigan Law Admissions Office.... Tell me I'm not motivated
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
Jus saw ur date getting a bj in the mcdonalds parking lot...u want anything?
I would love a rich wife. Then I would be like a gym teacher or some shit. Bigfoot hunter maybe.
You fell asleep on the toilet and he was like uh should I take her off?
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
I FOUND THE LEGS
But we made up last night and had unbelievably crazy sex tonight. I legit went blind for like 15mins from him choking me. It was awesome
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
Randomize
