We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
Just got done shaving my balls. You were right.
I just woke up in the 4th floor lounge at 5:30AM with my ipod on to springsteen and a condom on
Lesson learned: don't hide your vodka in your little brothers toy box.
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
The guy I brought home last night made a speedy escape while I was in the bathroom. The only trace I found of his flight was a lone sock on the stairs.... It was like a whorey low budget Cinderella
My brother really should've known better than to make me go egg hunting with his daughter when I was entirely too drunk to do so. Threw up in a plant in front of her.
He made me a flamingo drink and now I don't know why things are the way they are.
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
I knew you were on something when you said you were a puppy and you ate all the frosty Paws dog ice cream which says not for human consumption right on the side of it.
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