i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
I just realized I haven't got laid since the last time the Browns won.
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
I think she tried to suffocate me with her tits...she almost succeeded.
I have to make calls today at work. So I'm gonna call your phone and leave some random messages. Just delete them.
I'm still waiting for God to smite you for impersonating a decent human being.
I just puked on a sprinkler…Motherfucker tried to spray me
I KEEP THINKING INAPPROPRIATE SEXUAL THOUGHTS ABOUT YOU AND I AM SORRY.
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
Randomize
