Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
my family just sang happy birthday to baby jesus. no ones even drunk yet
Hit a parked car with a "property of Jesus Christ" bumper sticker. Wrote out five hail mary's and left it on the windshield.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
Shaun got a portable breathalyzer for christmas so now we can tell who the biggest pussy is at the end of the night.
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
Your headphones are on the door knob and I left you a burger on the door step.
You called me to pick you up from the bar at 9:00. When we drove over the speed bumps you put your hands in the air and pretended you were on a roller coaster.
Chang gave me a 1.5 gallon beer tasting cup, i have a new boyfriend with a huge stick, Members of the Irish Rugby team slapped my ass and cheered for firmness, and a couple of strangers are naming the child after me. Best. Weekend.Ever.