Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(805): View more from California

bar tonight had a doorbell to get in and last night i saw my neighbors fuck on the balcony, she wore a nurse outfit. Missouri isn't so bad...

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(805): bar tonight had a doorbell to get in and last night i saw my neighbors fuck on the balcony, she wore a nurse outfit. Missouri isn't so bad... http://tfl.nu/qw8q

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(503): View more from Oregon

Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.

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(503): Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie. http://tfl.nu/g56z

Replies (13) Good night (3559) Bad night (898) Order T-Shirt
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(847): View more from Illinois

You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.

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(847): You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive. http://tfl.nu/z8kz

Replies (19) Good night (7017) Bad night (1101) Order T-Shirt
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(702): View more from Nevada

What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs

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(702): What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs http://tfl.nu/q2ol

Replies (15) Good night (3633) Bad night (1522) Order T-Shirt
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(925): View more from California

I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.

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(925): I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts. http://tfl.nu/g61c

Replies (8) Good night (900) Bad night (3345) Order T-Shirt
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(718): View more from New York

Todays life lesson brought to you by last nights half pitchers of cheap sangria: you'll never get the stain or the SMELL of sangria vomit out of your bedroom carpet.

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(718): Todays life lesson brought to you by last nights half pitchers of cheap sangria: you'll never get the stain or the SMELL of sangria vomit out of your bedroom carpet. http://tfl.nu/d2h1

Replies (2) Good night (543) Bad night (2162)
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(651): View more from Minnesota

Just stole a goat. Bringing it to your house to cock block. Blame the goat not me.

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(651): Just stole a goat. Bringing it to your house to cock block. Blame the goat not me. http://tfl.nu/26ae

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(785): View more from Kansas

Its like a zucchini between his legs. An orgasmic zucchini.

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(785): Its like a zucchini between his legs. An orgasmic zucchini. http://tfl.nu/90ss

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(412): View more from Pennsylvania

I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it

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(412): I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it http://tfl.nu/mg8o

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(240): View more from Maryland

Stop banging my friends. This is getting weird.

(434): View more from Virginia

Stop being friends with hot 18 year old girls.

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(240): Stop banging my friends. This is getting weird. (434): Stop being friends with hot 18 year old girls. http://tfl.nu/td3o

Replies (12) Good night (3261) Bad night (622)
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(+44): View more from United Kingdom

Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know

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(+44): Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know http://tfl.nu/1326

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(631): View more from New York

Dude, I just had the best sex of my life in a porta potty at the NCAA girls lax championships but didn't get her name or number. But I have her sunglasses. How is this possible, I'm sad.

(1-631): View more from New York

I love your life.

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(631): Dude, I just had the best sex of my life in a porta potty at the NCAA girls lax championships but didn't get her name or number. But I have her sunglasses. How is this possible, I'm sad. (1-631): I love your life. http://tfl.nu/sy8e

Replies (10) Good night (1684) Bad night (419)
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(360): View more from Washington

Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis

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(360): Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis http://tfl.nu/354f

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(518): View more from New York

Seriously. Texted me 4 times and that didn't wake me up so he nicely called and left a voicemail saying he WOULD call me 8 times. So when he called back I answered.

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(518): Seriously. Texted me 4 times and that didn't wake me up so he nicely called and left a voicemail saying he WOULD call me 8 times. So when he called back I answered. http://tfl.nu/cv8i

Replies (3) Good night (289) Bad night (549)
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(310): View more from California

I think your high point was when the quesadilla was in your mouth and you were screaming "I can't chew!" and the Taco Bell guy just kinda stared at you like he wanted to strangle.

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(310): I think your high point was when the quesadilla was in your mouth and you were screaming "I can't chew!" and the Taco Bell guy just kinda stared at you like he wanted to strangle. http://tfl.nu/a8xs

Replies (0) Good night (552) Bad night (188)

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