The guy dancing on me has three visible teeth. WHERE ARE YOU?
wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
My Blind Date Arrived. She looks like something I'd draw with my left hand.
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
My roommate was eating ketchup out of a bowl. Get me the hell out of here.
I really don't understand how I cannot figure out how to work a fucking can opener when I'm hungover. Yet I still retained the ability to take a perfectly symmetrical picture of my erect penis and send it to every person in Matt's contacts the night before.
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've spent the last three hours watching 30 rock and eating marshmallows and ham. I'm considering taking up weed to justify my lifestyle.
I have two stamps on my hand....ones from the bar and one is from an aquarium...care to explain?
I wish the ER had shaved that part of my head. It would be easier to show people my staples at the bar.
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
Randomize