how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
i just sent my parents are gone come over I have condoms to my mom because Derek changed my numbers while I was passed out
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
Even when you're not here I still manage to get pad thai in my vagina
Leave the bottle at home cause either way I'm not taking another shot. You have no idea how long it took me to compose this text free of grammatical error.
Gold star for you, but I'm on my way and the soco is buckled in next to me. This is happening.
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
I just woke up tangled in fishing line while wearing someone else's bathing suit with fishes drawn all over me. What kind of sex did we have?
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
Tomorrow is my bachelor party. If I die tomorrow, please know I graded you a "check" as a sister. "Check-minus" when you got mouthy.
I just saw your mom take a body shot off an undergrad, please tell me you're somewhere near by.
if you and your penis don't hurry up, I'm getting drunk without you.
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
Randomize
