Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
I got to work, greeted my staff, then went into the bathroom to throw up. Who hired me to run a business???
Either she got face surgery at midnight, or i need to stop drinking...
I was in holding with a guy that got a DUI on a hover round. He was so nice. We're hanging out tonight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I made him drop me off at the wrong house waited for him to leave and crawled through several fences so he couldnt stalk me. How was your night?
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
When I said tequila slammers would be the death of me, I didn't intend it to be today. Oh god.
Yeah I'm at work. Nothing like the threat of blowing chunks on passing cars to make you feel alive.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Anywho, an ostrich attacked me today. Fucking useless pieces of shit birds.
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
when some dude came up to you and said he didn't like your shirt you just looked at him and firmly asked if he really thought that you gave a fuck.
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