VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
I elbow dropped a bag of ice to break it so we could make margaritas. I bled everywhere. Be proud.
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
I forgot to tell you, that tinder guy literally lives 15 floors beneath me. I have been creepily saying things to him like "I see youve got a hammer on the patio"
While buying Plan B the lady at the counter looked at me and said hope you have a successful night as I walked away in shame
He just sprayed AXE in his mouth to get rid of his bad breath... THAT DRUNK
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
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