names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
Why the hell did you smack that girls beer out of her hand at the end of the night then buy her a double jack and coke for?
Its called bad cop laid cop.
He got a slutty, ugly mother of a 7 year old, and I got a dog that only sleeps and shits on clean clothes. No one won in this break up.
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
Just woke up, shitty hungover, and realized that every article of clothing I slept in was backwards, bra included. Fuck you, gin. Fuck you.
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
Yeah, I probably need some combination of electric shock, massive quantities of LSD, and enough couch time time to make Woody Allen say "Enough".
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
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