yeah for some reason your penis didn't fit in my mouth the other day
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
"Not only do I bring a guy back to my hotel room....But I bring one back for my friend who's passed out drunk. Now that's what we call BESTfriends"
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
My gynecologist just commented on how well my vagina was waxed
so, give him that "thank you for fighting for my freedom bj" & he wont even remember what you said in that six min voice mail.
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
He stumbled into my room, flopped on my bed, shoes on my pillow and asked me for a juice box. Then fell asleep with the juice box on his forehead.
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
If you had a dick, I would hope it falls off and comes back to haunt you while fucking your ears at night. But you don't. But if you did, that's how mad I am at you
don't bring your nerd jargon into this conversation about my naked body
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
The dentist walked in on me trying to bottle some laughing gas to take home with me. That high.
Ok, as his sister I didn't tell you this but he's very familiar with pregnancy symptoms. So next time he calls you fat freak him the hell out by asking if your ankles look swollen.
Randomize
