I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial
Came home and the girl was sitting on the steps "talking" on her ipod touch AND was halfway done eating a raw cucumber.
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
I am sitting on my kitchen floor drunk with a bottle of jose cuervo, tryin to make cinnamon rolls and write a paper. I love college
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
Saying we were separated at birth, got on a ship and sailed here via onion barrel from Somalia didn't help our case at all....
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
I met a pornstar at his bachelor party and signed his shirt giving him wedding advice
Is there a classy way to tell him that to thank him for his service I would like to put his dick in my mouth?
"Happy Veterans Day! Now pull down your pants."
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
Randomize