i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
let's put it this way: i'm gonna stop drinking and get a gym membership. she's that hot
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
It only takes once for you to drunkly piss on a chick for her to lose interest in you.
I had to hold off a girl who was trying to check your pulse while you were passed out. She kept screaming that she was a nursing major and needed to make sure you were alive.
I'm sitting in the middle of them on his bed, forcing them to watch Brokeback Mountain. I am the best cock blocker ever.
There's something odd about buying beer for the first time while wearing my school sweater from kindergarten, but I don't mind.
Dude, you disappeared somewhere on the walk back and shortly after we got a call from your cell phone from this guy explaining that him and his roommates woke up to the smell of burning pizza and a naked stranger on their couch.
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
I threw up in my closet when I was hammered last night. Like a fucking toddler. I can't play with the grow ups.
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
Randomize
