yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
Just drove through Taco Johns wearing a drug rug and no pants. When I rolled down my window, the girl paused for a minute before saying "um... 4.07"
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
I will not fill you in on the details until we get back, so do not ask. I got peed on by the girl I was hooking up with last night.
as soon as I stop standing here with one leg up on my bathroom counter admiring my balls, I'm going to go tan. and then you may come over.
I wouldn't even cut tickets or put ppl in jail I'd just hand out punches to the mouth and Liam Neeson throat chops
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
I dapped up a cop while leaving the party
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
Randomize
