Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
There's a hobo dancing by himself. Is anyone going to ask how he got in the house?
Whoa. I woke up to 10 new text messages. All about bacon.
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
I didn't know White Castle was open when your sober.
I'm eating pizza in the bathtub
how drunk are you?
Several
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
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