Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
I am so stoned and my professor is handing out candy. I love Halloween.
So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just had to google "How do I get semen stains off of drywall." I'm relatively proud of this
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
Passing out during sex is actually quite pleasant. its like being rocked to sleep with a penis
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
Judging by the fact that he asked me if i wanted to serenade him using cocaine and Taylor Swift I'd say I so have it in the bag.
You know it was a weird week when you have a mystery bruise and youre unsure if it was from crazy sex or getting bit by a duck. Life.
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
She asked me to tell her the three words every girl wants to hear so I whispered "I play hockey" in her ear.
Randomize