id be glad to
I will die if light touches me.
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
While drunk it seemed like a good idea to barricade my roommate in his room with everything that we could move in our apartment, waking up to him screaming from it collapsing on top of him was just an added bonus.
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
She literally crushed my balls between her butt cheeks. It was both the greatest and worst thing ever. Dancers are awesome.
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
I have reached the state of intoxication where it is now a requirement to sit while peeing.
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
And I might get them triple pierced after that
Damn, I didn't realize you'd declared war on airport metal detectors
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
Did I tell you that I told him I deleted his dick pics and he almost started crying?
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
Randomize
