I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
Have you ever seen a midget fist pump? BEST. THING. EVERRRRR.
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I come back covered in mud topless and banging on your door, please have a warm towel ready for me
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
In the world of sexual, erotic texting, you rank somewhere between "how much teeth do you want" and "how dry do you want it"
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
he had a Pillsbury dough boy tattoo to remind him of his drug dealing days
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're snowed in with only two condoms. This will literally be valentines day russian roullette.
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
He was lasting forever and I couldn't take it so I faked an asthma attack
You showed up at my front door in a bikini with a fifth of tequila it was like the opening to a porno
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
He lasted less than 30 sec. in bed and then sent me a friend request on LinkedIn. Wtf.
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