perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
Sorry about flashing you in front of your mom.
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
he had a beard, sexy nerd glasses and kept referring to his penis as 'this dick' its like jesus was saving my perfect match for my prime
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.
You smoked too much and passed out, didn't you?
You know me so well.
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
Randomize
