ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
Apparently you walked through my house with your dress on your head
he made me salute his american flag boxers before i took them off
What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
I was about to watch some really classy porn. Title was ravenous for dick. I didnt know pornstars knew ravenous was a word.
you just kept yelling NO BUENO SENOR at the cashier and throwing coins at him, of course you were going to get kicked out of the grocery store
I spent ten minutes questioning her on what kind of cup she wanted... Then I asked what kind of water she wanted..
WOAH TOO HIGH
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
He was literally going down on me and giving me a foot rub AT THE SAME TIME. What more can I ask for?
When you were bringing him upstairs I told him to bring you on down to pound town. you're welcome.
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
Never in my life have I been so excited to nap as I am right now.
Shut the fuck up! I can hear you having sex over Pirates of the Caribbean you moaning whore.
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