what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
Why can't I live in a world where my only 2 options are rum bikini hot tub party or masturbating?
Went outside and he was playing rock paper scissors with a cop over a drunk in public ticket.
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
If our sexual relationship was relative to the Harry Potter series, I would have claimed the Wizard's Cup at least ten times.
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
Aaaaaaaand dick pic. God bless america, and god bless tinder.
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
Nothing says I'm committed to you for all eternity like letting him wear crocs to the wedding
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
Randomize
