talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
Their wedding is on my 21st birthday. I fail to see a way that this could end poorly.
I suppose drinking a cosmo at lunch alone can't look good but I mean... sometimes it's just necessary
After I gave him a handjob for a half an hour he told me I should be a taxidermist. I'm gonna take it as a compliment.
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
For what it's worth, I didn't think that hitting you with a crowbar as hard as I did would break your arm like that. You should drink more milk.
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
I'm not drinking for the rest of the week. I need discipline, celery, dick, and a bible.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
Randomize
