To make up for the snow days we missed he's making us write a paper on alcoholism. It's like he knows.
You know you're deprived when the only thing you taste while chewing gum is the 2 grams of sugar alcohol.
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
She just had to change the song on the radio cause I was tap dancing on her windshield
I'm covered in mustard and it looks like I nose dived in to barbed wire ??? Was last night that good?
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
I went out to dinner with the girls thinking I'd be home early. Instead I ended up in the Englishman's hotel room. Long Live The Queen.
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