tell ils to like buy her flowers and like a balloon that says, sorry I tried to fuck your sister. I think hallmark makes some of those cards too.
News update: stealing a playground is harder than it looks.
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
apparently it isn't appropriate to tell a coworker who is eating celery because it's "negative calories" that a blowjob is too
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
I had a dream last night where I used the marginal product rule to figure out how much more hangover I got per sip of four loko, econ is taking over my life...
At IHOP. It feels weird and sad that your cleavage isn't here for me to try to toss paper wads into.
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
I'm currently on a bowling date with my girlfriend and her boyfriend. It's pretty fun.
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
You know you hit Mardi Grad bottom when you come to in someone's kitchen on the floor and you are eating gumbo out of a Mixing bowl with a ladle......yeah rock fucking bottom
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
My hairdresser won’t do keratin treatments because of the toxins, but will put ecstasy up her butt at festivals...
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