Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
96 perecent sure i just took a shower with socks
just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
I need to figure out how to tell my doctor that I don't want to fix my possible fertility problems until AFTER I'm done whoring around in my 20s.
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
Are you stuck outside of your house because you forgot to walk up stairs? Cuz I've been there.
I knew I was in trouble when she kept referring to the next day as things we should do
So you brought her to my house and left her on my couch.
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
Either my apartment is haunted or I'm far more drunk than I thought
Randomize
