dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
We had sex this morning and after she goes, " So are we going to do something for Valentines Day?"
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
my mom used to put diet coke in my bottle. i can pretty much handle anything.
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
My birthday was already very memorable but her punching me in the face put it over the top. I love being 25 and still not giving a fuck.
you started petting my head and said "there there, majestical unicorn. it won't be long before we get you back to neverland."
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
It was all fun and games until she said "you're so pretty I wanna punch you in the face" and the proceeded to punch her in the face
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
Their children would look like the Michelin man and smell like chef Boyardee
somehow getting chased by a bulldozer was NOT on my to-do list for today. just saying
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
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