we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
I can't remember if the bartender cut you off after you broke your glass or after you wished the bar a happy winter solstice during your karaoke number.
Does saving a line for myself for the morning so I don't seem hungover at work count as responsibility?
Adult decisions.
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
Last time i carry you out of a forest
We need a bunch of roses, some chocolate, 2 cops, a mariachi band, and a thermometer
To be honest I've become too lazy for the work involved in getting laid.
You run marathons and you're too lazy for sex? Priorities, man.
Touche.
i sent my dealer a picture of the money i would pay him. i also told him i would pay him in cheez-its if he would prefer that.
My rule for unemployment is that I can't smoke before noon.
I haven't gotten up before 1 though, so it hasn't really impacted me.
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
You offered the police officer a Snickers ice cream bar and cried when he wouldn't take it...
I finally got my restraining order in the mail. Was that supposed to upset me? I'm just over here like "TELLEM BOY BYE!-\nlegally..."
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
Randomize