You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
i just saw my boxers from 2 days ago stuck in a tree 4 miles from my house
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
I woke up with my bra stapled to the ceiling, her dad was in the hallway winking at me. I was the less drunk of the bunch.
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
Sad fact: I'm doing that thing where I'm bored so I give myself Princess Leia hair and drink alcohol.
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
We are no longer allowed to have pre 4th party week. I woke up with a donut stuck to my face and 'MILF' written in black marker on my stomach.
Mother of the Year
That edible kicked in right as I was upside-down on that rollercoaster. Fucking.mind.blown.
Is there a reason drunk me put drunk you's phone in the freezer?
Holy shit dude........stairs
Randomize