I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
you called her butter tits and then threw up in your cup. i dont know if theres any way to come back from that
No, you always delete them without reading. Enjoy the virtue of morning innocence. What are you doing today.
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
I apparently started to text you last night. All it said was 'the whole clam'. I hope that means something to you.
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
You went full blown lifeguard... You wouldn't let me sleep until I was in the safety position, so I wouldn't die in my sleep...
You were so drunk last night you left the bar to go buy a razor so you could go home with him
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
If someone plays phil collins i'm gonna take off my clothes
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
You fucked him, didn’t you?
He showed up at my house with tacos, rum and a negative Covid test. Of course I fucked him. I’m just a simple girl that likes tacos, not Margaret Thatcher!
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