god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
Dude, the girl next to me just farted. Worst part, it smells like astroglide
A good Q tip ear swabbing is better than bad sex.
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.
Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
We'll wreck the fuck out of my furniture. How often does one really get the chance to fuck through a table with no negative consequences?
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
Wouldn't life be so much easier if you could just walk up to attractive men and say, "Let me bear your children" and it wouldn't be creepy?
Or possibly end in a restraining order?
Hey, scratch that. I've shit 8 times today. I don't have the energy to get laid so I cancelled my date.
Jager makes that raccoon appear... The one that shits in a basket in my living room.
Well we can add this to the list of 'where the hell did that bruise come from?'
Apparently I thought every drink in my house needed to have a buddy so I put some vodka in each one. Long story short being wasted at work because the gatorade you brought is 60% liqour is not a great idea.
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
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